Welcome to my blog.

My blog expresses my views and thoughts and in no way intends to offend however that does not guarantee it wont.

I write in a stream of consciousness and sometimes the odd typo or bad grammar may appear - please excuse these.

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Saturday, June 12, 2010


Oh My Goodness My Aching Back - A True Story

A middle aged couple decided that they would update some of the rooms of their house. New furniture, de-cluttering as they go.

They got the bright idea they would just pop over to a certain Big Blue Swedish store to see what they could find in the way of storage, wardrobes, desks, etc.

On a cold winter's morning they set out on their travels, around 40 kms from home to the Big Blue store, they hit the freeway with big expectations.

Hubby had the measurements on a little pad, wifey had taken some painkillers prior to leaving as she knew how big this blue store was and how her back was always sore by the time she finished there.

They found a parking spot and followed a stream of people, all with the same intentions, into the store. Fun was had as they walked around, looking at Billys, Bestas, Lacks, Effectivs, Vikas, Glassholms, Alexs and the like. They spied a lovely wardrobe called Pax Tonnes. They wrote down all the info stopped in the children's section and bought a bright red potty and some storage baskets for the munchkin in their life. They decided to head home and order online as the car was not big enough to take all they wanted to buy. Wifey's back was still pretty sore even with the painkillers, she could hardly feel her left leg at all, it was a relief to finally get back to the car. (Day 1 - over 2 hours in store)

Imagine their disappointment when they got home only to find that the Big Blue Store's website doesn't like Macs - I mean the world's largest selling computers but obviously not in Sweden. Their faces were sad, but not to be worried they would go back and do it in person.

Now rather than go the following morning as they had an appointment to see someone about getting a new kitchen, they somewhat foolishly decided to head back to the Big Blue Store the following evening. It was a Thursday night (and late night trading) they should have known better. Every man and woman (and child) was also heading to the same place. Or so it seemed as they travelled there. They managed to find a parking spot - almost the last one. Traipsed into the store, in a long line of people. Up the escalator to the top floor when hubby realised he had forgotten the pad with the measurements and notes. So wifey sat in a comfortable chair thinking he would be but a minute. But the crafty owners of the Big Blue Store make you go through the whole store to get out, so a minute turned into 15. A rather grumpy hubby finally returned.

Hubby and wifey made their way quickly to the wardrobe department, stood in line for ages waiting for someone in yellow and blue to be ready to help them with their purchase. Finally they were shown the Planner - piece of crap in wifey's opinion, but after about 20 more mins they had the rough of what they needed. Then they had to wait another 10 mins for another person dressed in yellow and blue to do the order. What do you know, the doors were out of stock. But undaunted the couple decided they would go ahead and order the rest and arrange delivery to home.

Now on this fateful night the wife had not taken any painkillers prior to leaving home, and so when they stopped to look at desks, she sat in another comfy chair and let hubby wander around. After sitting for a while, wifey decided she better find hubby and wandered around, but only a bit, before she found him. Hubby was excited, he had found some storage for his study. He dutifully wrote down the Section and Rack numbers and got a flat pack trolley in anticipation.

They looked at some more stuff together on the way down to the checkout. But alas when they got to the first Section and Rack, one part of hubby's storage was not longer in stock. Hubby, was rather grumpy by now and did a little man tantrum and stormed off and left the trolley behind. Now wifey in her normal 'peace making' style, calmed him down and took him to look for the other part of the storage. Luckily for her (and him) it was there, as was a spare trolley, so hubby huffed and puffed and loaded it up.

But then they saw the queue, wifey nearly cried, she was in a lot of pain. Hubby told her to go find somewhere to sit down while he waited. She found a bench just near where they would need to pick up the wardrobe pieces so they could take them to the delivery section.

Eventually hubby joined her.

Wifey asked him were the other piece of paper was, the one with the back-order info on it? Um, he replied, I put it down next to you when you were sitting in the desk section. Bugger, said wifey, you didn't tell me and so I didn't pick it up. So hubby takes off, back to the entrance, for the crafty owners of the Big Blue store don't let you go back in once you are out. Wifey dutifully sat waiting for their number to be called.

Hubby got back with the paper - phew, but still they waited, sitting patiently (well not so patiently was the hubby). Finally there was the order, so they wheeled it to the delivery section and arranged delivery - for Monday. (Day 2 - 2 1/2 hours in store).

Now by this time it was after 9pm and hubby and wifey's tummies were rumbling so they had to stop for fast food on the way home which added another 30 mins to the journey home as wifey did not want to drive and eat at the same time.

Now the next morning dawned, cold and chilly but sunny and wifey suggested they go back to the Big Blue store one more time as there were other things they ran out of time to look at the night before. Some people think wifey is a glutton for punishment. Hubby agreed, much to wifey's amazement after all after the night before when he ranted and raved she thought he would never set foot in there again.

So off they went, wifey took some more painkillers, as she had not recovered from the adventure of the night before and still had numbness in her leg. But she was a brave solider who wanted a new desk.

Lo and behold, it was very busy yet again. Who knew they were having a sale? Certainly none of this couples' goodies were on special. They had fun writing down the Sections and Racks for Vikas, Alexs, Effectivs. Hubby saw a nice computer stand to put his G5 tower on. Wifey by this time was sitting on another chair looking at bits and pieces on the wall. Silly hubby left the computer stand next to his wife - and again he did not tell her. Obviously he thinks she is a mind-reader. When she joined him a short time later near some other storage he asked where it was. It was very lucky that he was still close to the spot - sigh.

So hubby and wife headed down to the self serve racks and with much joy found all the things they wanted stacked there. Wifey's little black beauty was glad it had a turbo on the way home - who knew that things could weigh so much. There was another huge queue and wifey's back was in spasm, so her lovely hubby stood in line yet again. (Day 3 - 2 1/2 hours in store).

Today wifey's study is now up and running with her new desk and new storage and lots of de-cluttering taking place. Although she now knows she needs even more storage - either that or she needs to get scrapbooking in a big way.

Tomorrow is hubby's study day - oh and getting ready for the dismantling of the old wardrobe.

There might even be another visit to the Big Blue store next week. Wifey has decided to take another week's leave just in case.

The names in this story have been changed to protect the innocent.


  1. LOL, poor you! If you do go next week, drop in and see us when you're going past. : )

  2. Oh Kakka, everything I loathe about Ikea - but written so beautifully. Glad you're getting your home into shape - but wow, you've suffered for it!

  3. Wow, you two are so brave! Our rare trips to the big blue store have almost ended in divorce, but three times in one week is just asking for trouble!

  4. Glad you survived. Maybe take extra painkillers next time. But I think you are very game to go again so soon!

  5. Hahaha that was hilarious Kakka. We do a once a year pilgrimage to IKEA and my husband hates it!!

  6. I think I need to take a Vicodin just from reading this. The big blue store hasn't come to Kansas yet. We have something called Nebraska Furntiure Mart which is size of about 6 football fields and is I fear the equivalent. We bought most of our furniture there.

    Oh and in response to your comment on my blog come on out to the Midwest any time you want!! We'll show you a good time. xx

  7. I am so glad you wrote this story as I now know I WILL NEVER GO TO IKEA AGAIN; I just wouldn't be able to do it now. I've not even seen the newer store.
    Took your advice and tried to search online but obviously wouldn't work for my Mac either so......no more goodies from the big blue store for us.
    Look forward to coming to your place to view all new things when it is all completed.

  8. And all this time I've been dying for an Ikea store in our city. Who knew?



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