Welcome to my blog.

My blog expresses my views and thoughts and in no way intends to offend however that does not guarantee it wont.

I write in a stream of consciousness and sometimes the odd typo or bad grammar may appear - please excuse these.

Please feel free to leave a comment if something inspires you to do so.

Monday, December 6, 2010

One Of Those Years - 1977

Have you ever had a year that lots of major things happened?

1977 was one of those years for me.

Jan - I confirmed I was pregnant for the 2nd time, to a man I loved who was not my husband but who I knew was my soul mate. I had suspected as much late in 1976 but was too scared to take any tests.

March - the father of my unborn child moved in to share his life with my eldest daughter and I and to await the birth of our child.

June - I gave birth to my 2nd daughter.

July - I filed for divorce from my first husband who had left 18 months before.

September - We bought a new house and moved in, still there 33 years later.

November - my decree nisi was granted.

November - I married my soul mate, and we are still just as much in love 33 years later.

2001 is another year that had many memorable events - as it comes up to the 10th anniversary of that year, the events that happened are very much on my mind - I will put together a post early in the New Year.

Sunday, December 5, 2010

The Long Journey To Nowhere

Thanks to you my wonderful blog friends - there are many of you that have been popping back to my blog and checking on me during my long absence. A special thanks to those that have left encouraging messages on my last blog post ... seeing your caring words has meant the world to me.

Instead of heading out on the highway looking for adventure, I seem to have been on a long journey to nowhere ... life is just plodding along, one day at a time. That is not to say there have been some highlights recently ... 2 weeks of holidays from work (back tomorrow) when we flew to Melbourne to visit a very special lady in my life ... Happy Birthday Jenny xxx

We also got to see lots of my hubby's Victorian family while we where there and I really enjoyed spending time with each and every one of them. While we were away, 2 of my daughters and my eldest grand-daughter joined us and it was fun having them along and I think they enjoyed their time over there too.

I am still in a black funk (well maybe now it is just a dark grey) over the loss of my little grand-son and the impact this has had on our family, especially my daughter and son-in-law. I imagine this will get a little darker again when we get to what would have been his birth date. But I am sure that somehow we will continue to move forward, just like countless other families do, each and every day. In a perfect world no-one would have to face these types of challenges, but then we live in a far from perfect world.

I will try and blog more frequently now, and get back to regularly visiting your blogs. I am looking forward to the Aussie Blogging Conference in March when hopefully I will get to meet many of you.

So here's to turning this car around and driving with a sense of purpose and joy.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Head Out On The Highway

I'm having trouble this week, well to be honest for the last few weeks, getting motivated at home or at work. It's like my battery is almost flat, or I'm running on leaded petrol in an unleaded car. I need to get away, from life, my job, everything. So instead of going to work this afternoon, I had this morning off to attend my grand-daughter's award ceremony, I am going to do what I love, I'm going to go driving with the music up loud, the sun roof open, taking some time for myself. My get-away is inspired by Steppenwolf's Born To Be Wild (words and music by Mars Bonfire).

Get your motor runnin;
Head out on the highway
Lookin' for adventure
And whatever comes our (my) way

Monday, October 25, 2010

The Red Pen - A Little Tale Of Today

I have a red pen, a biro that's pretty old, I use it every day and yet somehow it seems to last. Today it had gone, disappeared, vanished into thin air.

I knew that I had used it in the morning, but when I went to get it from the pen holder on my desk a little later in the day, it was nowhere to be found. Gone, disappeared, vanished into thin air.

I searched high and low. I moved papers, and my desk is covered in lots of papers!! I looked on the floor in case it had rolled off my desk. I checked my workmate's desk, as she has been known to 'borrow' my pens and highlighters before. It was nowhere to be found. Gone, disappeared, vanished into thin air.

And so I had to find another red pen, this one was flash, a gel point not a biro, it was new and shiny and wrote well, but I missed my old red pen. It had gone, disappeared, vanished into thin air.

Work continued, as it does, and suddenly it was nearly 3 pm. I decided I needed to go for a walk to revitalise myself, I was getting sleepy in the afternoon sun that shines through the window. So I took my hair down, I had pinned it up earlier with a pen. What I hear you say? Yes, I can pin my shoulder length hair up with a pen - funky huh?

I wandered outside, breathing in the fresh air. My workmate - the one that borrows my things came upon me and asked if I could help her finish some urgent work in another building and of course I said yes. After all, I am nothing, if not helpful.

About and hour and a half later I returned to my desk to pack up for the day, and what do you know, there was my old red pen. Just sitting there, where I had put it when I took it out of my hair.

I told you it was my favourite red pen, the one I use every day, but normally just for writing. And so I left work happy, my red pen was found, in fact one could say it was never lost at all, it was in fact very close to me all the time.

Monday, October 18, 2010

The Big Fail

Well I got cocky - after two great attempts at Banana Bread I thought I would try rhubarb crumble. FAIL - I over cooked it in an attempt to get the top to brown (as the recipe said it should). Hubby pretended to love it, sweet man that he is, but it was very average indeed. So maybe that ends my cooking in the new kitchen. Sigh - oh well, I am trying to lose weight so maybe no more cooking sweets is a good thing - glass half full and all that. But what made it worse was I was watching Junior Masterchef at the time, talk about making an adult feel lower than average - hee hee.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

A Pain In The Neck

I was wondering why my neck was suddenly so sore yesterday afternoon and evening and is still so this morning. All the muscles are so tight and ropey. Then I realised - yesterday I not only water walked, but did some swimming as well. Who'd a thought? That also explains the slightly sore right shoulder (my bad one).

Still will be back there this morning so hopefully the 'hair of the dog' will ease it rather than make it worse - LOL.

Also caught a bit of sun yesterday and the boobs are a little pink this morning, so while the East coast of Aus is shivering, it is warm and sunny here. So must remember the sunscreen today.

Hope your weekend is cruising along, and if you are on the East coast - rug up as I believe today is more of the same.

Friday, October 15, 2010

Our Candle is Lit

Our candle is burning as part of the Wave of Light - part of the International Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.

To join in, light a candle at 7pm your time (Friday night) and leave it burning for an hour.

With Tears Of Love

As many of you would know, my daughter and her family recently suffered the loss of my grandson at around 16 weeks gestation. The loss of this little one has impacted on our family in many ways. One positive outcome, and we must always look for positives in our lives lest we get overwhelmed by the despair, is that my daughter has started a new blog called ... with tears of love.

Her dream is that this will become a place of support for other families, not just parents but the wider family as well, a place where people can come to to share their stories or just realise that they are not alone in how they feel.

Today is launch day and I know she would love if you had the time to visit.

Friday Flowers

I love the Friday Flowers meme that I often see on blogs like Pink Patent Mary Janes and Diminishing Lucy, among others. But I rarely have cut flowers in my house given I work and would not be able to enjoy them.

Recently my hubby potted up some 'pots of colour' - lovely pansies and violas - we found at the nursery. I love looking out the kitchen window and seeing their bright sunny faces each morning, so today I thought I would share.

Last weekend we planted some petunias in the garden, so hopefully I will be able to enjoy their colour once these reach the end of their cycle of life. We also started a new rose garden, home to the 3 roses bushes I planted for my grandchildren and 4 others we bought last weekend. So hopefully there will be some beautiful cut roses I can share on other Fridays in the near future.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Water Walking - It's Back

Yippee, the pool is open again and this morning off I went with JB and spent a fantastic 45 mins chatting and walking and chatting and walking. The dreaded easterly wind was almost non-existent, the sun warming (even though it was 6am) and the pool water warmed to an almost perfect temperature.

Guess where I am going tomorrow - yep, back to the pool.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

My Next Project

There is still stuff to be done in the kitchen, floor coverings and blinds mainly then of course the big project - the new bathroom. But in the interim there is my library. At the moment I have black bookshelves and not much else. So I am thinking of getting white bookshelves and some cabinets, a nice black and white chair, painting the walls white or ivory and then putting up some Japanese fabric pieces that I have had framed. The cupboards I have seen are not Japanese, rather they are sort of French/Queen Ann - really I have no idea if that is the right description but they are nice. I thought just plain white Ikea bookshelves - so the room is sort of an eclectic mix.

Then of course there is my study - but that is a whole other disaster area - sure to take months to make over. The library on the other hand, could be done in a couple of weekends. Yep, think the library is next.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

The Sound Of Frogs

Life seems to go on, rushing its way past, seconds turning to minutes, minutes to hours, hours to days, days to weeks, weeks to months ... and then something simple, something common brings back the tears and sends me into the darkness of loss. Today it was your statue sitting beside your rose, tonight it is the sound of frogs. I know that some people may not understand how the loss of a grandchild you have never met can affect a person so much, I don't understand it myself really, but here I am in bed thinking of you again. And so I came to write ... The Sound of Frogs

I hear them croaking in our garden

and I think of you

My heart is heavy, my soul feels torn in two

I hear the frogs tonight, croaking outside my window

and the tears fall

Tears for you, tears for your family, tears of loss and pain

I walk in my garden and I see the frog statue I bought

and I think of you

My heart is heavy, my soul feels torn in two

When will the teardrops stop?

Will one day I hear the frogs and not cry

Will one day I see your little statue and not sob

Will one day this all seem like a distant memory

As much as my heart aches

As much as my soul feels torn in two

I don't want to stop the pain

In case I forget you

My Little Frog Prince

Friday, October 8, 2010


I don't know if anyone else feels the same, but I am over the disrespect shown by the Channel Ten reporters in Delhi. They do these out on the street spots and the way I seem them, they are making fun of the Indian population. Sure their practices of things like public ear-cleaning are different to ours, but there is no need to mock them. Especially given that some of the on the street people have less English than others, please don't make fun of them. As an Australian I am embarrassed that this is the way you are choosing to present the Games.

Come on Channel Ten - lift your game.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Bells, Whistles and What Nots

Sometimes I feel that the designers and manufacturers of products go a little too far with the bells, whistles and what nots.

We bought a new kettle - stainless steel with quiet boil - great but when it has boiled it has a little bell that goes off - not too bad in the scheme of things, but can't really work out why.

We also bought a new stainless steel toaster - now it has a countdown display, just in case you want to stand there an watch, but then when the toast is ready is sounds like a reversing truck ... beep, beep, beep.

Then we have a Blue Ray DVD on which the display says Welcome and See You.

My car says Zoom Zoom and Good Bye on its display.

The TV makes a musical note when you turn it on.

My computer does the Mac boing when I turn it on.

Bells, Whistles and What Nots are taking over my life. I am not complaining as the appliances themselves are great and make my life easier and of course I love my car. Have you noticed this newish trend?

Monday, October 4, 2010

I Baked

Now if any of my children read this they may well faint ... as they well know I am not a domestic goddess in fact I dislike anything to do with cooking. Well that was then and now I have a new kitchen with a great new stove. So yesterday, upon finding some very over-ripe bananas in my fruit bowl I decided to bake. Yep bake ... banana bread.

I used the recipe from the Original Margaret Fulton Cookbook for Banana Bread (minus the walnuts as I didn't have any). Now it said to cook for 1 hour at 180 C, but after around 45 mins I started to smell a little bit of a burnt smell, so I quickly took the cake tin out and rescued it just in time. Obviously fan forced ovens cook faster ... who would have guessed.

Hubby and I actually like the fact that there is a crispy outside to the banana bread. It tastes yummy even though I didn't have quite enough sugar and I used raw sugar instead of white.

So here to prove that I indeed baked - is a photo of the finished product, sliced and buttered ready to serve.

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Kitchen Renovations - Almost Done

Well it is almost done - a few minor things need doing, like getting new floor coverings and new blinds for the windows. Also the range hood man needs to come back and finish the fitting, but to all intents and purposes it is done. So may I present our new kitchen.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

My Favourite Place In Sydney

Do you have a favourite place to visit in a city that is not your own? On my first trip to Sydney way back in 2001 I happened upon the Chinese Gardens of Friendship - tucked away between Darling Harbour and China Town. This beautiful, tranquil setting always refreshes and inspires me. The beautiful plants, the tranquil water, the hidden corners, the architecture and the dragons - not only the carved dragon wall, but real life dragons that if you are really, really lucky appear before you.

I would love to get to the Gardens each time I visit Sydney, but the reality is that I very rarely find the time. This visit I was determined to get there and yet again I was enchanted as soon as I walked between the carved stone welcoming dragons and entered the wooden doors ... and the Universe smiled upon me ... I was honoured to have a close encounter with a dragon who chose to walk towards and sit beside me for a while.

If you ever get to Sydney, I hope you find the time to visit and that you are as inspired and enchanted as I am with this beautiful place in such a busy city. To whet your appetite here are just some of the shots I took on this visit ... enjoy.

A Painful Truth

Anyone who has read this blog for a while would know I suffer from pain caused by osteoarthritis and DISH, this past couple of months has seen me in more pain than usual, especially my left knee and both my hands.

While in Sydney, I was really handicapped when it came to walking around, but I did what I could and really enjoyed being over there. However, each night I was close to tears and the day I walked from the Chinese Gardens to the Aquarium, I was actually in tears while walking. It is hard to face up to the fact that walking makes you cry ... especially in public, so I was thankful that when I got to the Aquarium I was able to take a moment in the darkness of the platypus exhibit to shed a tear while sitting on bench.

This moment lead to an Epiphany ... and it was not a good one. I have always wanted to travel to Canada and New Zealand ... hubby and I were thinking in a couple of years. Now I am not so sure that I will ever be able to get there. This caused me to have a little meltdown when I talked to my hubby one afternoon ... I mean, these 2 trips have been my dream destinations for many, many years. But it seems now that I can not justify spending all that money to travel and then not being able to get around to visit the places I want to see.

At 55, I am way to young for knee or hip replacements, but constantly walking around in pain, waiting for my knee to collapse is not fun. It is hard to lose a dream, and hopefully, somehow, this dream will still become a reality ... but at the moment, it is hard to see that happening.

The other thing that saddens me, is that my problems will likely be inherited by my children. Two of them have travelled, two of them have not, I hope that if there dreams are to travel they do so before it is too late.

Friday, October 1, 2010

A Room With A View

While we were in Sydney, we stayed in a room with a view - Level 19 at the Meriton Apartments in Bondi Junction. For someone with mild vertigo, it was a little difficult for me to go out onto the balcony to take these photos - but I just had to share. Lets just say I didn't go too close to the railing.

Oh and this post is not sponsored in any way, shape or form ... however if someone from the Meriton just happens to read this post and feels like giving me a discount next time, I certainly wouldn't say no ... I love staying there.

Thursday, September 30, 2010

My Little Frog Prince

Too early for a name

Too small for a breath

Thousands of tears have fallen

Since you left

Today they scatter your ashes

Mixed with other tiny babes

On the roses for remembrance

Today we plant in our garden

Our own little rose bush

I will smell the sweet blooms and always remember you

For though you may be gone

And we never got to meet

You will always be in my heart

Buried down real deep

And so my little grandson

I need you to know

I love you to the moon and back

And it will always be so

In honour of who you are to me

My Little Frog Prince

A little froggy statue I have found

To sit by your rose for all to see

Beside your rose will also be

A rose bush for your sister

Another for your cousin

Roses for my grandchildren

All grouped together

One, Two and Three

For in my heart

That is how you will always be

My grandchild number 3

God Bless my sweet frog prince

Grandma xxx

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

Or so the saying goes.

There has been much happening in my personal and professional life which has been sapping my desire to blog. Overload is what I am feeling, and somehow finding the time and the words to sit at my computer and blog ... well it all seems like hard work, and my blogging has never felt that way before. There is however a little blog post on my other blog all about sunshine.

I can say that I am missing you all, I miss finding out what you are doing, I miss your humour, your stories, your friendship. I am also missing writing and so I am hoping to get my mojo back real soon.

Tomorrow I fly out to Sydney with 2 of my daughters and my littlest grand-daughter, it is unlikely I will have the time to blog while I am away, but I hope the break with give me some rest, re-inspire me to write or at the very least I will have some photos and memories to share.

Hope you are still all here when I get back. xxx

Saturday, September 11, 2010

This Man

This man loves me unconditionally
This man holds me when I cry
This man raises me up when I am down
This man is mine

This man is a father
This man is a grandfather
This man is my hubby
We are blessed that he is ours

This man is a worker
This man is a drummer
This man has a sense of humour
I give thanks that he is mine

This man is not perfect
This man sees in black and white
This man is called Grumpy
This man is mine

This man is the half that completes me
This man is the answer to my prayers
This man is my lover
I am honoured that he chose me

This man is my rock
This man holds my heart in his
This man loves me just because he can
This man will always be mine

This man is no longer with us
This man left us before we were ready
This man was also called Grumpy
This man was my father in law

This man raised my man with love
This man raised my man to be loving
This man is the reason my man is who he his
It is this man I also thank


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