Leaving On A Jet Plane

I walked into the spare bedroom this morning and all that was left was an unmade bed, a clear floor space where once there were suitcases she was living out of while staying with us, and the scent of her perfume.

No long lanky daughter stretched out on the bed with her computer where she would lay or  sit and Skype for hours.  No Hi's from the other side of the world to me either.

Just silence and an empty space.

The goodbyes are over, the travel has started, the Perth to Melbourne leg is done and she is on the long journey now from Melbourne to LAX, then to Seattle before the jump to Sitka in Alaska.  She arrives on Thursday morning Perth time, she left here at 11.30pm last night.

Her impatience to get on the plane was palpable, as was her anxiety at leaving.

As a mother it is bittersweet to want nothing more than your children to be happy, but to know that to do this they have to leave you, and not just leave your home or the State in which your live but the country as well.

So my heart is breaking today, but I know it will mend when I see her smiling face at the end of her journey.

Now I really need to download Skype so that can happen.

Have a wonderful journey daughter of mine, may your heart be always filled with happiness and know that is always my wish for you, as it is for your sisters and brother.

A Goodbye cuddle on Sunday with her sisters and brother
(she's the one 2nd from the right or 3rd from the left if that is your preference)

No Phone, No Internet and Goodbyes and the State of Denial

We have had no phone since Sunday 11th, which means no Internet either.

Telstra said they would have it fixed by Weds 14th, then texted us that day to say another week.

The reason, they were too busy and understaffed.

What pissed me off more than anything was that they sent a text, as a valued (obviously not) and loyal customer for many many years, I think they could have at least phoned.

So when hubby phoned them back and complained they as least directed our home phone to my mobile, but he had to ask for them to do this.  They also agreed to up my data download on my iPhone so we could intermittently check emails and the like.

So I was pleased when we were phoned around lunch time today to say they were fixing the phone.  It seems to take all of about 3 minutes, a 8 day wait and 3 minutes work, seriously Telstra I am not happy Jan.

Because of this, I have been absent in the blogosphere for much of that time, I will endeavour to catch up with my reading, but I am sure I will have missed much that is happening out there.

In other news, my youngest daughter is about to head off to Alaska tomorrow, yep Alaska and not just for a holiday!!  She has a working Visa and has been given a fantastic opportunity to not only work over there, but to live with the love of her life.

Me, well I am in denial about the whole thing, can't say that I will be tomorrow night as we bid her farewell, but denial is a nice state of being sometimes.

Yesterday we had the family - all my children and their significant others, my 3 grand-daughters and my Mum and step father - over for a BBQ lunch. To say a few tears were shed at the end of the afternoon would be the truth, but none by me, because as you know, I am in that state (the denial one).  Tomorrow night, shares in Kleenex will go up, I can guarantee that, cause the dam will break because denial is such a temporary state, don't you hate that?

In other news, hubby and I celebrated our 35th Wedding Anniversary on the 12th, 35 years of love and happiness and hoping for many, many more.

Thanks for popping by xxx

Just had to share this photo of Great Grandma (also known as Mimsie) reading to her 2nd youngest great grandie xxx 

Of course there was the obligatory family photo, and yes it is hard to get all of use looking at the camera and smiling at once, although saying 'monkeys' seems to have helped with the smiling part - lol
Not sure why we are all squinting though - although it could have something to do with us watching a small red blinking light on the camera to make sure we all said monkeys at the same time.

Moments In Time - My Second Born - A Series of Oops

Oops I did it again - got pregnant that is.

I was still technically married to your older sister's Dad although we hadn't been together for quite a while. Hadn't technically been going out with your Dad for that long either - although we had known each other as friends for a fair time before our 1st official date. Didn't really plan on it happening either - your conception that is - not loving your Dad - I sort of knew that from when I first met him - knew that we would be together forever - he is that special.

You can skip this bit if you want - but it is part of the story.

You were conceived on a night that your Dad came over for dinner, still early in our 'relationship' and lets just say dinner was not the only thing he and I shared that night. Because neither of us thought it would happen, we got caught up in the moment and didn't think 'long term'. Oops. Who would have thought I would get pregnant that easily - well later I would know that was the case, but really - the first time??

So I went to the Dr and asked to go on the pill, and told your Dad 'safe sex' had to happen until I could start taking the pill - the Dr had told me to wait until I got my next period (I know TMI) - and so I waited, and waited, and waited.

Did I think I could be pregnant - no, I had no symptoms and as I said who gets pregnant the one and only time you have unprotected sex - oops that would be me!

Dad and I kept dating, kept falling further in love, all scarily fast. One day I woke up and thought 'hang on, I have been waiting for 'you know what' (is that better?) for a few months and I know that is not unusual for my body - but 'what if?'.

So I talked it over with a friend of mine who said well go and have a test - now in those days you didn't have the home pregnancy test, you had to go and wee in a jar and then wait at least 24 hours for the results. And so I waited, I didn't say anything to your Dad, after all I was sure it would be negative - did I say how I had no symptoms. Oops, I was wrong.

So dilemma time came, what was I to do, would your Dad hang around - I knew he was the one for me, but did he feel the same, should I terminate, should I talk to someone and find out my options. Now back then abortion was not an easy thing to make happen, but it was an option if you knew the right doctor to go to - but abortion is not something I have ever been comfortable with - I mean to me it is not right to take a life because it is inconvenient - but then, what if your Dad walked away - my first husband had - could I be a Mum to 2 children on my own?

My friend said 'Well at least find out if termination is an option' and so I went and talked to another Dr who told me all about the options and to go away and think about it. So I did, I thought long and hard and while all this was happening your Dad had a 2nd thought's moment and told me things were moving too fast (if only he had known just how fast). And so I told him to go - after all, this had happened to me before and that relationship didn't last. I also realised that weekend that you were here to stay - there was no way I was letting you go.

Within 48 hours your Dad was back in our lives - but I still didn't tell him about you. Only I knew (and 1 friend) that you existed, I needed to keep you a secret for a while longer while I got the courage to tell everyone. I knew some people in my life would be unhappy and disappointed that I was again to be an unwed mother, I still wasn't sure how your Dad would react - but I was content with my decision - you were definitely part of my life.

Eventually I got the courage and told your Dad - and my family - and your sister. Dad handled it really well, was even excited - the family - well some took it better than others - your sister was over the moon. Dad moved in, we put the nay-sayers out of our minds, and we made a life together, full of love and happiness. Didn't really matter what the rest of the world thought, we knew we were in this for the long haul (and 33 years later we are still here and still happy - so I guess we did know best).

Eventually it was time for you to be born, I was huge as a house, and just like your sister - you went over your due date and so the Dr decided to induce you. I went to hospital the night before and Dad and you sister went to stay with Mimsie so that she could look after C when your Dad came back to the hospital in the morning.

Well you had other plans and I woke up at about 3.30 am and rolled over in bed and thought - oops - I had wet the bed - not a lot just a little. So rolled over again and thought - oops a little more - um maybe my waters have broken? So I laid there a little longer (I was in a shared room and didn't want to walk the other lady up) - no contractions - so I rolled over again and yep a little more wetting the bed. So I rang the nurse and they took me down to the labour ward. Still no contractions but they agreed that my waters had broken high up and so only little amounts were making there way past you (TMI?).

I asked them to ring Dad - they said 'oh let him sleep you will be hours yet" - but I somehow knew that wouldn't be the case. Eventually contractions started - really close together - not slow and steady but fast and frantic - and I again asked them to ring your Dad and they said 'oh you have hours yet'. Yeah right - what did they know.

I eventually got them to ring Dad - about 6.30 and he was on his way - but so were you - I said time to push - and they said 'oh you have hours yet' - Oops they got it wrong.

I said I don't think so and so someone looked and then then - hello - I think this baby is coming now. And so we rush to the delivery room, and they keep saying hold on the Drs not here yet.

And your Dad walks in the door and they ask 'are you the Dr' and he says no - goes pale and sweaty and comes over to me. I take one look at him - know he is going to faint and say - go outside and wait. The Dr rushes in just as you are born at 7.25 am - quick, I knew it was going to be.

Poor Dad in the meantime is waiting outside in the father's room, they had them in those days, wondering if everything is okay as he knew I was close to having the baby and no one has come and got him. Must have been about 20 mins later before someone says has anyone told the Dad. Oops poor Dad. He comes back and there you are all wrapped up, with your cute little head with lots of hair popping out the top of the swaddling. He was beaming with pride and couldn't wait to ring everyone and give them the news that we had another beautiful daughter.

Childhood 101

My eldest daughter Christie, the mother of my gorgeous 15 month old grand-daughter Imogen has started up a blog.

Her aim is to share her experiences and to find out what other Mums have to share as well. So for all the wonderful Mums with small children who visit my blog I would love if you would take the time to visit Christie at Childhood 101 and let her know what you think. Maybe you could even pass her blog address onto your friends after all the more the merrier.

Christie was trained as an early childhood teacher working with children from 4-8 years, she then started and ran a childcare centre in Sydney before having her own daughter and then returning to Perth earlier this year.

Bigotry Boycott

Last year I made a decision to boycott watching Channel Nine's Today Show - I also sent an email to them, they said they would get back to me, they never have. And so I have refused to watch the show ever since. We are one of the Neilson TV rating families and I hope at some point they ask why when I log in, if Channel 9's Today Show is on it gets turned off immediately.

Now what happened may not seem a big deal to a lot of people, but I was outraged as never before that someone could show such blatant bigotry and not be censored in any way. Now I know everyone is entitled to their opinion, but when you are one of the hosts (although not the co-anchors) of a high rating TV show, you should keep your outdated offensive comments to yourself.

What set me off I hear you ask, well it was over a newspaper article that stated that in Queensland (that other forward thinking State - not) there was a proposal that Year 12 gay students should not be able to bring same sex partners to their Year 12 Ball/Formals. Now that in itself made my blood boil, but then that self-righteous bigot Cameron had the audacity to not only agree with the proposal but to liken a young gay man/women bringing a same sex partner as being exactly the same as a student bringing hard drugs to a formal and handing them out. What sort of idiot is this man? I don't care if he is a fundamentalist Christian or just an uneducated fool, how dare he make such a statement on television as a Channel 9 employee. Different if he was someone asked to comment but he is in a position to influence others because he is a face that is regularly on TV. He went on and on about how it could influence other kids to try it out - come on as if kids need any encouragement to try anything out, if they want to they do. What it does do is make kids aware that it is okay to be different to the norm, that you don't have to live a lie, that if you are gay your can also have a loving relationship. What did he think the gay kids were going to do, have sex on the dance floor, because all gay people are perverts? Please - get real.

So vote with your television remote - if you ever have a reason to take offence at something a TV personality, co-host, anchor or the like says - that comes from their own prejudices refuse to watch.

Here is my email:

As the mother of a gay son, who came out at 15, how wonderful it would have been for him to go to his school formal with his partner if he had one at that time. My son, knew he was gay from a young age, has never doubted his sexuality and is loved and supported by his whole family.

Cameron, I hope that you never have a gay son or daughter, because your backward, bigoted attitude is a disgrace and I doubt you would have the compassion to support what it is a hard road for your child. How dare you sit in judgement and compare a personal sexuality with taking illegal drugs.

The world needs less people like you, especially espousing their outdated opinions in the media.