Family Stories, Part 3 It's all about the poop!!!

I think most family's must have some poop stories, and ours has more than a few!!

I suppose in polite society these stories stay hidden, in our family they are often bought up with laughter much to the embarrassment of whichever family member was involved.


So here is a small selection, read on at your own risk!!


Story 1

Hubby had taken me to the dentist to have a wisdom tooth pulled out, our son was a wee baby dressed in a onesie and swaddled in a blanket.  While I am in the dentists chair, hubby is cuddling our son in the waiting room when there is an audible if somewhat muffled explosion from our son's nether regions.  The smell was a dead give away as to what was happening, as was the yellow stain slowly spreading through the bunny rug.  I believe a few other people who were waiting started to move chairs!!  Poor hubby had to quickly exit to the car to change a very, very, very pooey bottom and clothes on the backseat of the family car! I walk out into a waiting room with a distinct odour and the receptionist having a chuckle, wondering where my hubby had got too and three girls tripping over themselves to tell me about the huge poop their baby brother had done.


Story 2

One night, not long after our youngest daughter was born, hubby and I and some visitors were sitting in the visitor lounge at the local hospital while our baby daughter was asleep in the nursery.  In those days visitors were not encouraged to hold other people's babies and more often than not the babies were taken to the nursery just before visiting hours began.  So here we are chatting when in walks one of the nurses with our baby daughter, naked from the waist down to show us just how good an aim she had.  Yep the nurses large pocket on the front of the smock she was wearing was filled to the brim with poop.  Luckily the nurse saw the funny side!


Story 3

This one involves daughter 2.  We had a safe cot for our 3 daughters, the ones that are totally enclosed, usually wooden and with fly-wire in the panels.  I went in to get daughter 2 up from her nap, to find she had not only woken up, but had taken off her nappy and then thoughtfully smeared her poop into the fly-wire!!  Needless to say, that was one doozy of a clean up for mother and child.



Story 4

I have lost count of the number of times I have had to suffer the embarrassment of having to have to unblock the toilet during each and every pregnancy (and to be honest some times when not pregnant as well).  Constipation it seems leads to this less than exciting toilet experience!!  Then there are the less than funny names my youngest daughter has come up with for this ...



and saving the best story for last

Story 5 (and yes kids, it is that one!!!)

Hubby had taken daughter number 2 to change her nappy.  She was about 10 months old and prior to and during the nappy change, she was munching/sucking on a ginger nut or was it chocolate biscuit.  During the said nappy change she offered hubby what he thought was a piece of said biscuit except it wasn't.  I will leave the rest to your imagination.

And yep this story is the one that is the most regularly retold, much to hubby's endless dismay!!


So hoping I haven't upset anyone's sensitivities with this more than honest set of family stories, I will say thanks for popping by xxxx

Family Stories Part 1

My Mum is setting a trend with telling family history and stories over on her blog, so given I have needed a prompt to blog lately I thought I would take a different tack and put out there a few of the 'funny' family stories I have heard over the years.  In some cases, it might be have witnessed as well!!

So Story One comes from my hubby's side of the family.

His mother, once told me that on the first date she and her future hubby had, they went to the movies (or it might have been a dance).  Anyway, she was extremely shy and didn't go to the toilet the whole time they were on the date and by the time he dropped her off at home she was busting for a wee.

So she quickly said her goodbyes, probably making future hubby think she was not in the slightest bit interested, and rushed through the house and the back door to the out-back loo (or dunny if you are an Aussie).

Trouble was, the light was broken so she rushed in, pulled her undies down and from the way she tells it was weeing before her bottom hit the seat.  All good, except the lid was down!!!

By the time she realised that, it was too late to stop.  I sought of know the feeling having had really full bladders myself at times.

I must confess that her telling me that story, early on in my relationship with her son, was kind of special.  She was a quiet and shy woman who didn't really like the fact that I had been married before and had a child.  Needless to say, she eventually was more than happy with me as a wife to her son and a daughter in law to their family.  Her opening up to me about a very personal moment was one of the signs of acceptance I had been looking for.

Image from Google Images
Titled : Pen and Wash, from drthomson-artist.com

Story 2 should appear some time next week.



Thanks for popping by, do you have any similar stories to share? xxxx

The Vagina Monologues (well my version anyway)

Does anyone else out there, get a little freaked out when you get the letter that your Pap Smear is overdue from the Department of Health?  Maybe it is just a WA thing, but I kind of freaks me out that a random government computer knows more about my vagina than I do!!

And then there are the reminders about mammograms - I just hope it is the same random government computer as the one about my pap smear, I mean just imagine if it is a whole bank of government computers knowing about my lady parts!!!  Horror : )

But on a serious note, do you keep your regular check ups in your diary, does your doctor's surgery remind you or do you just fly by the seat of your pants with these things, which is what I do.  I wait until I get the reminders and then make the appointments, although my doctor's surgery also sends me a reminder as well so it is hard to forget them.

So the appointment is made and hopefully, fingers crossed the results are all clear.

And just so I can share a little more, but not about me, my daughter's doctor has Aspergers (well we are pretty sure she does) and she gives a monotone monologue account of what she is doing and when my daughter was re-enacting the whole experience to me on the phone last night I nearly wet myself laughing.  At least my doctor is a little more laid back about what she is doing down there.

Thanks for popping by xxx

A Father's Day Gift

Like most men in the late 50's my hubby has pretty much everything he wants and if he doesn't he goes out and buys it for himself.  He is a man of simple tastes, except for his drum kits, he likes to potter in the garden, listen to music and occasionally read a book.

This year as usual he got gift cards for Bunnings and we had a quiet afternoon tea with my parents.  My mother, also bought hubby a gift.  She always does, he always tells her not too as he is not her Dad, but she likes to come bearing gifts.

Rather than buy him a gift card, she bought him a Newton's Cradle.  We left it sitting on the breakfast bar after my parents had left, both of us where down the other end of the house when I heard the click, click, click of the balls bouncing off each other.  Sneaking down the hall with my iPhone at the ready, I found just what I thought I would find.

Hope you enjoy ....



I'm not sure how to make this only show the latest video, so you get three for the price of one!

Thanks for popping by xxx

I'm Still Here

Thanks to @mybabyjohn and @the elephant's child for checking on me during my absence, and to my youngest daughter and her girlfriend Kam for taking the time to see if I am okay as they have missed my blog posts. Love you all xxx

The quick low down is that I am battling my arthritis at the moment, and nothing I do seems to be improving my pain levels at great deal. However, the trigger point acupuncture that the physio is doing, is releasing some of my muscle pain and I am confident that over time this will continue to help.

I don't really want to blog endlessly about how bad I am feeling so that is the reason I have not been here much. Nor do I feel inspired to be here when I feel so low.

But I love that people care, it makes me cry a little but in a good way - if you know what I mean.

Now to put a funny spin on the day I would like to share some photos of funny face (aka my younger daughter). Funny face tends to pick up your camera when you are not around and take photos for you to find at a later date. These are from a few years ago, but I found them again recently. Now I haven't asked her permission, but hey, I'm sure she won't mind. The first 5 she left on my eldest daughter's camera and the last 4 on mine - all on the same day.

And these two show you how beautiful she is when she is not pulling funny faces.

So What Is This Ad Telling Me??

Now as you know I have had 4 births and one miscarriage, I am overweight and I suffer from diabetes, so bladder leakage is something that apparently I need to think about. Since coming home from Melbourne, with a cold/infected sinus - lots of coughing, sneezing etc, I do on occasion think, whoops it is going to be this time I learn about loosing bladder control? Indeed I have on occasion crossed my legs just in case - TMI???

Then I see this ad for Tena Pads - now I know it is a fun ad, made to be light hearted about an important issue, but really - does this means I no longer need a toilet if I am wearing incontinence pads? I always thought they were for minor leaks - but if a toilet dropping from the sky is what these pads can do for me - well then who needs toilets?

Just think of the freedom - no more waiting in queues at airport bathrooms, no more public toilets in general, just wear one of these pads and Bob's your uncle so to speak.

So producers of this ad, have you missed the mark here, or is it just my warped sense of humour that is getting a mixed message? Because this ad reminds me of a woman busting to go to the loo, not one who has sneezed and had a little dribble down below - if you get my drift!!

What do the rest of you think?

A Week Of Ups and Downs and The Bathmat

Been an interesting week or so for this family of mine.

Work has been extra busy for hubby and I, we are both having some time off work for the next couple of weeks so tidying up all the jobs we have for hand over, well busy is probably not even close to what it has been. He has another couple of days, but last night was my last day at work until early August - bliss.

I am heading over to Blogopolis in Melbourne, well I hope to be, but for some reason my pain levels have hit an all time high, and I am really worried about how I will cope walking and standing, so I have been contemplating not going, still undecided, and luckily I have a few days to pull out and not lose my money for airfares and hotel accommodation. I really want to go, so maybe I will tough it out.

Last week, my middle daughter and eldest grand-daughter ended up with a water feature in their bathroom, a pipe burst somewhere inside the wall and bulging plaster and leaking tiles became an interesting feature to say the least. Consequently, they came over to our place for showers (luckily we live about 2 mins drive away) for a few days while it was being fixed. Don't know about you, but all my family use bath sheets (extra large towels) rather than the normal bath towel size. And it just so happens a few months ago when my grand-daughter was staying with us overnight, I gave her a normal smaller size bath towel I happened to still have. After her shower she said to me, Grandma - you gave me a bath mat instead of a towel, well I had to laugh as it really was a towel not a bath mat, just not the size she is used to. Well what happened last week was that her Mum did give her a bath mat by mistake and sweetie that she is, my grand-daughter used it as she knew her Mum was in our 2nd bathroom still having a shower. I am still giggling about it even now thinking about her trying to stay warm while drying herself with a little rectangle of towel, it was really cold over here last week.

This morning my Mum rang to say she had taken a tumble yesterday afternoon and dislocated her shoulder! Mum is 79 1/2 so tumbles are not good at her age. But luckily she has good strong bones and apart from now having to wear a sling for 2 weeks and have some physio, she is okay. The reason she fell is that she nearly sat on her cat and jumped up so fast that she twisted and lost her balance, taking out a spare chair on the way down to the floor. I had to laugh when she told me the paramedics have to give her a giant wedgie to lift her up. Good on her for seeing the funny side and being so strong and courageous, not sure that I could do that in the same circumstances.

So a week of ups and downs and funny tales about bath mats, but looking forward to some time off work, maybe getting some painting done - well I choose the colours and hubby does the work, some nice lunches out and about and maybe, just maybe, heading over to my favourite city of Melbourne.

7 Signs of Aging - My Way

Well we all know that Oil of Olay has it's list of 7 signs of aging

Lines and Winkles

Rough Skin Texture

Dullness of skin's appearance

Larger appearance of pores

Blotchiness

Dry skin

Age spots

Well here is my list

Finding your first grey pubic hair - I mean how bad is that - of course you can avoid this if you do the whole waxing thing.

Noticing that the crow's feet around your eyes are now canyons - and yes you can kid yourself it is just because you laugh too much - right.

Dryness - not just the skin on your face and hands, but everywhere - and I mean everywhere if you get my drift - if not, think lube.

Age spots - those nasty little brown spots that appear from nowhere.

Skunk lines - yes that nasty white/silver/grey stripe that keeps appearing with more regularity between hairdresser appointments.

Hair loss - yes even women lose their hair as they get older - scary really.

Tightness - oh I wish I could say my butt it getting tighter - but I mean muscles and ligaments that seems harder to stretch the older you get - I know I used to be able to reach the highest shelf once upon a time.

Do you have any you would like to add - hell we don't have to stop the list at 7.

And in honour of the bloggers without make-up or nude blogging challenge I have changed my profile pic to the real 'now' me rather than the young cute kid me.

Want a Laugh?

Check out my post of my other blog, I need to go and wipe the tears of my cheeks.

Oh How I Love To See Him Laugh

Yesterday my eldest daughter, son in law and their adorable little girl came over to finish painting my dining room and entry. They have been helping us out with the painting as my hubby just hasn't found the time with all his travelling for work and I'm just a waste of space when it comes to painting.

My hubby has been under lots of stress with his work and seems to have had little to smile and laugh about lately. Well yesterday was no exception, he was working from home trying to get stuff done before he flies out to Adelaide today (he is also working from home today).

We tried to give him the space he needed but a little munchkin loves her Grumpy and loves his drums - for those of you who don't know my hubby is also a drummer. Our other grand-daughter also loves mucking about on Grumpy's drums and keyboard. While hubby is a little anal about his drum kit with everyone else - he loves it when his grand-daughters want to jam. So after numerous trips into Grumpy's study to help him with his work - picking up his papers and handing them to him - I think she was saying - hey Grumpy enough work I want to play with you, she did some drumming. Hubby had to take some photos while she sat on my knee and has downloaded them onto his computer.


A little later after tea when munchkin was waiting for her Daddy to run her bath, Grumpy and the munchkin played the tickle me game - munchkin's laugh is so infectious that my hubby laughed so much his face hurt. Oh how I love to see him laugh, how I love to see that sort of joy on his face.

As I said before - grandchildren are the best gift your own children ever give you and these small moments in time are ones you want to frame.